If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
