Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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