Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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