Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
No stitches, just platelets and will power
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Randomize