I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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