I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
