Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
