all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize