Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Randomize
