do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize