id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
