I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
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