the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize