Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize