Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize
