I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Randomize
