In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Who put my cat in the fridge?
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