I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Randomize
