Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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