I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
40s are totally the cure
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
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