it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
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