Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
