Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
