HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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