Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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