You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Randomize
