We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Randomize
