the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
