I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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