did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
