so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize