you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I don't deserve a penis
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
