Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
