I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
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