For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
