Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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