if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
wat bout pragnant strippers??
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
