Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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