her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
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