we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
