...so i touched it.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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