she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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