Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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