i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
