Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I take back everything I said about communal showers
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
