How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
You made out with two different species that night
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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