I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
My vagina just clenched in fear
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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