Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
