Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
