Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
